


Thank You for Everything

by Svedjik



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 4: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Gen, Harry Potter Needs a Hug, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Sorry, Sad, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:28:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22157821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Svedjik/pseuds/Svedjik
Summary: When his name comes out of the Goblet of Fire, old memories and thoughts come back to haunt Harry. I suck at summaries, sorry.
Relationships: Hermione Granger & Harry Potter
Comments: 1
Kudos: 39





	Thank You for Everything

**Author's Note:**

> So if you've read some of my other works, you know that I suck at and don't really like writing dialogue and most of it takes place within Harry's head in this one. I also wrote this instead of sleeping because I just needed to vent, so I apologize for that. I hope at least one person finds something redeeming about this. 
> 
> Seriously though, if you're struggling with any of the topics in this fic, try your absolute hardest to get whatever level of help you're comfortable with. No one should have to go through this alone.

The last time someone had shouted his name in public, Harry only remembered the punishment that came after: no meals for a week and no being let out of his cupboard. That had been before the start of his first year at Hogwarts and now, early in his fourth, he heard it again. He heard his name being yelled into a crowd. He heard the obvious anger in the voice, only this time it was coming from Headmaster Dumbledore instead of the abusive rage-aholic of a walrus that was his “Uncle” Vernon. After a lifetime of abuse, Harry could only assume that the anger was directed at him, nevermind that it was coming from someone who had only ever tried to protect him from the world that both loved and hated him in equal measure.  _ There’s no way I’m getting out of it this time, _ Harry thought to himself,  _ If I’m lucky, they’ll only snap my wand and send me back to Hell _ . Resigned to his fate, and with Hermione’s prodding, Harry began to shamble toward his Headmaster. He could already hear the whispers of the entire school around him, “Cheat, liar, fraud, hack, git.” Once more, his heart broke as he could hear who he thought his best friend, Ron Weasley, join in the name calling, a sneer of pure disgust on his face. Once more, Harry felt the familiar whispers start again in his head:  _ Idiot, freak, worthless, you don’t deserve friends, you’re MEANT to be alone and hated.  _ No amount of consolation could help him. The entire school, his home, was against him once more, just like in second year. And as Harry reached the door to the trophy room, he felt the piercing glares of the other champions and headmasters cutting through his hastily erected mask of indifference.  _ They hate you,  _ his mind hissed,  _ They wis- no, WANT you dead _ . He remembered the venom in Dumbledore’s voice as the decrepit old man belted out his name at the stunned gathering on students and just wanted to escape. As to where, Harry had no idea.  _ Maybe Sirius will take me in? _ He thought bitterly. After all, why would his godfather, who he had only met once, want anything to do with him after this? 

With Harry’s thoughts occupying him, he failed to realize that any time had passed at all, still in shock at hearing HIS name come out of the goblet. Dumbledore and Crouch had read the rules, but all Harry had heard was a dull buzzing while his mind murmured,  _ It doesn’t matter what happens with the tournament, you’ll finally get what you deserve: death. After all, you’re such a burden on those around you, why would they ever want to help you stay alive? _

Trudging back to the common room, Harry managed to stumble upon the one person he knew would always have his back: Hermione. “Harry, I know what’s going through your head and you’re wrong! There are people who believe you didn’t enter and I’m one of them. I’ll always have your back as you’ve had mine,” Hermione immediately whispered to him as she wrapped him in a strong, but gentle, hug.  _ She’s only saying that because she’s as lonely as you always have been. She has no other friends at all, just you and that pathetic backstabber Ron. _ “SHUT UP!!” Harry exclaimed. Hermione just gazed back in fright at her best friend’s sudden outburst. “Hermione, I’m so sorry, you did nothing wrong, I promise. The voice in my head won’t shut up and go back to whatever hole it’s been living in for the past few years,” Harry pleaded.  _ Hopefully you didn’t manage to screw this one up too, you pathetic, worthless, useless excuse of a human being. _

As the days went on, the torture from his fellow students only got worse. Thankfully, Hermione hadn’t abandoned him like everyone else did, instead standing by him and acting as a shield of sorts. Except none of it mattered. As attentive and supportive as she was, Hermione couldn’t stop everything. She didn’t notice the signs. Harry pulling away, mentally checking out, not caring if he got caught hurling spells at his bullies. She just thought it was normal teenage angst. Should she have have spoken up, probably? But it didn’t matter, the damage to Harry had already been done. The brightest witch of her age just wasn’t able to save her best friend. She failed to notice the deepening bags under Harry’s eyes, that he was thinner than when she first saw him on the Hogwarts Express first year, that always had something literally itching at him. She thought it was just the stress of having to compete. After all, how could she have known what was really bothering him if he never spoke up about it? About three weeks after the Goblet, Harry abruptly stopped her after class, hugged her, and mumbled a quick, “Thank you for everything,” in her ear. That was when Hermione knew that something was desperately wrong with her best friend and that she was too late to do anything about it even as she rushed to Professor McGonagall’s office in a last-ditch effort to save her only remaining friend. 

_ That’s it,  _ Harry’s mind breathed,  _ Just one more and you’ll be free from the pain of this world, the hate, the anger, the betrayal, just one more sip and you’ll never have to face anyone ever again you worthless piece of shit. _ And with that final thought, Harry downed the last of the poison Snape had so gleefully left unattended and could just barely make out the cries of McGonagall and Hermione as he drifted off into eternity. 

Of course, when he woke up in hospital two days later, he knew something had gone wrong. He saw a tear-drenched Hermione sobbing over him, his transfiguration professor not much better. _Look at what you’ve done now, you moron! YOU. MESSED. IT. ALL. UP! YOu really are as worthless as Vernon always said_. But Harry knew better. He knew that, deep down, he at least one person who would always be at his side, the only one of his friends to stick by him and help him. The only person he could trust at Hogwarts was right beside him the whole time. For once in his life, Harry beat the voice in his head and, for the first time in years, he was able to think clearly and all was on the way to being well, even if he did still have the tournament in the near future. Harry was free.


End file.
